Design by Revmovement.

Main Menu

Who Is Lorem Ipsum Anyway?

The Monster of the Blank Page!

  Lorem Ipsum was a once-brilliant Latin scholar, who went to the dark side and became the scourge of all who must write... he's the monster that inhabits every document template until you vanquish him with actual content.

 

     He haunts the lives of web designers, programmers, website owners, bloggers and business people, bringing with him the horrifying reality that no matter how colorful the website... no matter how good the company’s product or how relevant their message...      you have to get rid of him first.

 

     But as soon as you think you've removed him from your screen, a cold lonely chill envelops you. The wind howls with malevolence, through twisted tree-letters and punctuation-shaped shrubs that refuse to make sense of themselves. You’re doomed.

     You'll die a lonely, miserable death, desperate to come up with the words to fill the blank white prison around you. As the deadline for your project marches toward you with demented glee, the thunderous laugh of Lorem Ipsum taunts you from within the hellish depths of the computer screen.

 

     Don't you wish somebody could
        KILL this bastard for you? *

 

* Contact Us 

Who is This Guy?... Part 3: Family


Bill, Alycia and Smudge, late 1999

I’ve been blessed beyond comprehension with a loving family from the start, being adopted at birth by Ruth Berle in 1962, to growing up in Ruth’s home with her kind mother Sophie and her husband Milton. My early family life was peaceful and by all definitions very pleasant. It took a few years until I started to understand that not everyone had a major celebrity in their house... and several more years to grasp what a major celebrity means to the rest of the world. Didn't everyone have big parties with movie stars and members of the Kennedy family showing up? Wasn't Lucille Ball everyone's close family friend? Sandy Koufax didn't play catch with a baseball in everyone's back yard? Jackie Gleason didn't teach all the kids in the world card tricks?

The truth is, of course, that nobody raised in the world of show business or financial privilege understands how different it is until they see the rest of the world. We never learn how good, or how bad it can be until we've walked in the shoes of non-privileged people a couple of times either. But thanks to a good upbringing in most areas by my folks, I had a pretty good life with them... the "big tragedies" and teen angst and life-or-death! problems I had were pretty minor in the grand scheme of things. I only got a brief, unpleasant taste of “family problems” in the ten years after Ruth passed away (and Milton's behavior passed from the ridiculous to the unforgivable).

 

 

Those interested in the lurid details of a Hollywood Hostile Takeover, the creatures who prey on celebrities and their families, and the darker, really stupid side of showbiz can feel free to read all about it in my book titled “My Father, Uncle Miltie”. It’ll only cost you a couple of dollars on eBay.

 

But good fortune smiled on me again and gave me a new family. I have a beautiful and caring wife Alycia, a 23 year old son Tyler, and a very spoiled dog who loves me to pieces.

CLICK HERE for Part 4: Sales / Writing / Work Life